Mother Teresa...

Time magazine wrote an article about Morther Teresa. It's about her supposed crisis of her faith in God. In her personal letters, she revealed she can no longer feel the presence of God... she even went on doubting perhaps God doesn't exist anymore... and this lasted for 50 yrs probably until the day she died... She was able to cope with this spiritual stuggle later on in her life though. Instead of concentrating on 'feeling' God, she just kept on with her original calling and continue on to do God's will. Was her 'sprititual suffering' some sort of spiritual attack from the enemy or perhaps it's the will of God? Dunno, could be both I guess. I see it perhaps something similar to Paul's thorn in the flesh, which God didn't remove for Paul even after repeated plead.

When Mother Teresa was younger... when she was able to hear God... she did asked to know Christ like none has known before. So I guess God granted her request! When Jesus called to the Father, 'O God, O God why have You forsaken me?' I guess mother Teresa got first hand experience of what that feels like...

She even ask the folks who she wrote the letters to... to please destroy these letters, for she feared that if the public ever found out that she's a spiritual 'hypocrite', smiling on the outside, but dying on the inside, people might think less of God... or perhaps even doubt the existence of God like her...

However, I think it's good that these letters came out to the public. It actually can be great example of what being a servant of Christ is really like. It's not about how we feel... because obviously our 'feelings' can deceive us..., but it's about simply doing God's will.

Who's Mother Teresa really? Did she single handedly start and managed her successful ministry? God may not be felt by her, but God's clearly blessed her ministry and doing the work right along with her. The spiritual/phsyical fruits her ministry had bear can't possibly be all by her and her alone! So I see it as a sign that God is obviously with her...

But anyway, who am I to argue with Mother Teresa... if that's how she feels, that's how she feels... but the moral of the story is that feeling can be deceiving. If one's driven by feelings and couldn't care less about the will of God... I suppose one can end up like Juan... Just sell drugs and live the good life! Why bother saving those poor Mexicans... and live as one of the poor Mexican?

Jesus want to save us poor humans and came to live as one of us poor humans.

Mother Teresa want to save those poor Indians and went to live as one of those poor Indians.

If Mother Teresa and Jesus are not close, then I don't know what is being close to Jesus.

May the Lord be gracious to Mother Teresa and allow her to be able to finally feel her Lord's love in full!!!

Today's scripture reading is about Eli... they also lived at a time when God seemed quiet... and slowly, he seemed to care more about the happiness of his sons than whether or not if God's pleased...

Anyway, moral of that story is the same, we should always continue to do God's will even if we don't hear Him that often. To us Bible readers, it's clear that God is still God... what's wrong with those lousy bible characters?!?!? To us outside observers, God is definitely with Mother Teresa... what's wrong with her 'feelings'?!?!?

When one lose sense of God, if you continue to do God's will, then you can do no wrong. Feelings can certainly be deceiving... further, perhaps Mother Teresa doesn't have the gift of being single for all of her life... perhaps we're meant to 'feel' God thru others. Perhaps if Mother Teresa had a physical loving husband who loves her, maybe that could helped her with her struggle a bit...

I dunno, God knows what He's doing. It's just fascinating to read Mother Teresa's story. In my humble opinion, for sure Mother Teresa has glorified God with her life, regardless of how she felt about God. Right now, God's will for my life is to simply love my wife and continue to try to reach out to my family in order to get them saved.

Am I right God? If not, You've gotta speak up and let me know, okay? ;)

(1 Samuel 2:27-4:22)